Postpartum depression isn't something that people like to talk about. Childbirth is supposed to be a joyous, exciting time, and those experiencing postpartum depression are often afraid to talk about their negative feelings due to fear of stigma or simply because they feel that they must be wrong to feel the way they do.
However, postpartum depression can be a serious condition and identifying it in a loved one can be essential to helping them get the support they need to feel better. In this article we'll take a closer look at what postpartum depression can look like, and how to best support your partner if you notice the signs.
What is Postpartum Depression?
Also referred to as the baby blues, postpartum depression (PPD) is a common mental health condition that affects many new mothers. This type of depression occurs after childbirth, typically within the first year. PPD is not a sign of weakness, and it’s not something that can be simply “snapped out of.” With the right support and treatment, women can recover from PPD and go on to have a healthy and happy relationship with their baby.
Recognizing Postpartum Depression Symptoms
Symptoms of PPD can vary from woman to woman, but common signs include:
- Feeling sad, empty, or hopeless
- A loss of interest in activities that were once enjoyable
- Changes in appetite or sleep patterns
- Difficulty bonding with the baby
- Excessive worry over child health
- Irritability or anxiety
- Panic attacks
- Physical symptoms like headaches or stomach problems
Note: In severe cases a woman may develop what is called postpartum psychosis. This is an extremely dangerous condition and must be addressed immediately. Someone who experiences postpartum psychosis may have delusions, hallucinations, extreme mood changes, and suicidal thoughts. If you notice any of the symptoms of postpartum psychosis, seek help right away and if you believe that they may be a danger to themselves or the child call 911.
Understanding Perinatal Mental Health
Perinatal mental health refers to a woman’s mental health during pregnancy and the postpartum period. This is a critical time for mental health, as hormonal changes and sleep deprivation can exacerbate underlying mental health conditions. A new baby and the extreme fatigue that comes along with it can be problematic to women's health, especially for those who may already experience a depressed mood.
Women who experience perinatal mental health issues (mental disorders during pregnancy) are at a higher risk of developing postpartum depression.
Encouraging Your Wife to Open Up About Postpartum Depression
Create a safe and supportive environment where your wife feels comfortable opening up about her feelings. Post partum depression has nothing to do with whether they are a good mother, and it's important to make this clear.
Listen to what she has to say without judgment, and validate her emotions. Encourage her to express her feelings and concerns around postpartum depression symptoms. Offer to help her find professional help, such as a therapist or support group, and offer practical help by taking care of the new baby and recruiting a family member or members to do the same so she can have breaks.
Supporting Your Wife’s Recovery From Postpartum Depression
Encourage your wife to seek help from a professional, such as:
- Talk therapy with a mental health professional
- Medication, if prescribed by a doctor
- Support groups for women with postpartum depression
- Online resources and hotlines for postpartum depression
Practical Ways to Support Your Wife During Postpartum Depression
Practical help is also extremely important for someone experiencing postpartum depression. Help with household chores, take more time with the new baby or other children, even if it means taking time off work. Cook meals and prepare snacks (weekly meal prep can be a simple way to do this, especially if you work together, or even recruit another family member to help). Encourage your wife or partner to take breaks and practice self-care such as eating regular meals, going on walks, and taking time for a bath or nap. Give her periods of uninterrupted sleep. Accompany her to doctor's appointments or therapy sessions so she knows that you are in her corner.
Managing Your Own Emotions and Needs
In the midst of protecting her mental health, don’t forget to take care of your own emotions and needs. Postpartum depression can take a toll on the whole family. Here are some helpful tips for taking care of your own mental health during periods of postpartum depression in a loved one:
- Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist
- Practice self-care, such as exercise or meditation
- Take breaks and give yourself time to rest
- Educating yourself about postpartum depression and its effects on relationships
- Don't be afraid to ask for practical help. Family and friends are almost always happy to step up with babysitting or meal delivery
Building a Support Network for Postpartum Depression
Build a support network of family, friends, and healthcare professionals can be essential to help your partner manage her postpartum depression and help them get better. Here are some lifelines that are important to set up for a new mother and baby:
- Healthcare providers, like obstetricians or pediatricians
- Mental health professionals, like therapists or counselors
- Support groups for women with postpartum depression
- Online communities and forums for postpartum depression
Navigating the Recovery Process of Postpartum depression
Postpartum depression can be treated effectively, but recovery from postpartum depression takes time, patience, and support. Be patient and understanding, and remember that recovery is a journey when it comes to postnatal depression. Giving birth can be traumatic and a good mother can feel overwhelmed by the pressures of new motherhood. Encourage her to get help when she's feeling unable to cope with things like feeling tired, low mood, or dealing with the anxieties of a new parent. Celebrate small victories and accomplishments along the way, and continue to offer support and encouragement, even after symptoms have improved.
Remember, if you see indications of suicidal ideation or psychosis, get help immediately: call a crisis lifeline, 911, or get her to the emergency room.
Maintaining a Healthy Relationship
Maintaining a healthy relationship during the postpartum period can be challenging, but it’s essential for recovery. Communicate openly and honestly with your wife or partner about your feelings and needs, and find out what she wants. Make time for date nights or activities that you both enjoy. Prioritize intimacy and connection, even if it’s just a hug or a kiss in between diaper changes.
Addressing the Baby Blues (Perinatal depression and Postnatal Depression) in Brooklyn
Supporting a wife with postpartum depression requires patience, understanding, and support. By educating yourself, creating a safe and supportive environment, and seeking professional help, you can help your wife recover from postpartum depression.
At Williamsburg Therapy Group, our team of doctoral-level psychotherapists offers a number of evidence-based therapeutic approaches for postpartum depression in Brooklyn that can offer tools for reducing stress, improving sleep problems, shifting negative thought patterns, and establishing protective factors for reducing the risks of intrusive thoughts and negative feelings that accompany postpartum depression or postpartum psychosis.
Postpartum depression can happen to anyone, and it is important to support your partner and let them know they are still a good mother despite the baby blues. Individual therapy is one of the most effective treatments for postpartum depression, and can greatly improve quality of life during the stressful time after giving birth.
Williamsburg Therapy Group
